Tears...

I was told that I was a cry baby when I was young… Cried at the slightest matter… Seems like I’m not a very likeable baby then…

However, as I grow older I realized something… I could no longer cry easily as I used to be… It seems to me that the only time I see my tears nowadays is when my brain is suffering from oxygen deficiency – yawning…

I’ve lost my ability to cry!

I like crying…

I mean the process of it… I see it as a form of relief… Just like sighing… It lets out all the negative feelings that are held within…

And there are times I wish I could just cry it out…
But it seems like my tear duct has died on me…

Is it that I’ve really lost my ability to cry?
Or is it that the matter is not worth crying?

I don’t know…

To me, crying is not a sign of weakness…

Instead, I actually see it as an act of bravery and I’m envy those who are able to cry easily… These are the people who are brave enough to show their emotions openly…

Something I truly lack of…

Especially when it comes to negative emotions…

There seemed to be a glass wall between the real me and the one I present… Maybe subconsciously I believe that by opening up these emotions I’m actually opening up myself to more danger…

To what danger?

I don’t know…
It’s like a natural instinct to protect myself… Maybe too much at times I think…

Sometimes, by opening up is also a way of protection…

Something I should Really learn about...